Showing posts with label April Fools. Show all posts
Showing posts with label April Fools. Show all posts

Monday, April 1, 2013

An Idea Whose Time Has Come

There's just no use fighting it.  It's time for our website to undergo some changes.  For several years there has been one man with his finger on the pulse of the gaming industry.  One man whose ability to predict the future borders on prescient.  That man is Michael Pachter.

Oh, but you're one of the ultra minority that still doesn't believe in Michael Pachter, eh? You've got your head so far in the sand you haven't yet beheld the brilliance of Michael's predictions, eh?  Well, buckle your safety belts cuz I'm about to drop a heavy dose of spray-tanned reality on you!!

August 2008: Pachter predicts Nintendo Wii will cut price.
Sometime later: Nintendo Wii cuts price.
BOOM! Predicted!

June 2010: Pachter predicts PS3 will cut price.
Sometime later: PS3 cuts price.
BAM! Predicted!

September 2011: Pachter predicts XBox 360 will cut price.
Sometime later: XBox 360 cuts price.
KA-POW!! Predicted!

Still don't believe me?  Pachter says Nintendo is doomed.  Don't agree? Well, roughly one billion years from now, our sun will begin transitioning to a red giant.  At that time, the temperature on Earth will be so high all organic life will cease.  What's Nintendo gonna do then, huh?? HUH?!? DOOMED!!!!!!

Our only hope as a species is that Pachter predicts a way to migrate to some other solar system.  I say we begin giving Pachter his due now.  Come, follow us into this new era, at the PachTemple!!

Sunday, April 1, 2012

Site chat is not going to happen today at 6PM EST.

Oh behalf of our new overlord Michael Pachter there will be no site chat today. Sorry to say this but it seems he finds these site chats to be the glue for the site so he is slowly trying to take the site apart. It seems he wants to cause discord in our community so this it the best way to do it.

 Also here is a message from Michael Pachter. I will put it after the break. Might want to read it.

The Pach Is Right

I'll admit it.  After all these years I finally see the light.  Michael Pachter was right.  Nintendo.... they're just doomed.  They don't have enough $2 games, they haven't cut price enough, their online sucks, they don't charge extra for online services. 

It's over.  Pach wins.  I can't believe I didn't see his point sooner.

What a fool I was!! And what a genius Pachter is.

I now submit this new, repurposed website, PachTemple.com, as an open apology to the man... Michael Pachter.